Today, my "Tales from Motherhood" is about me.
The story of my baptism. My testimony. Because as a human, I know I need Jesus all the time...but as a mom, I need Jesus more than ever!
Last year, a few months before my 36th birthday, I was baptized. This is my testimony of how I came to know God, and how years and years later I decided it was time to be obedient to God (despite my worry and fears) and take a bath in that holy water.
I grew up at church. My mom always made sure that we knew Sunday’s were for church and family time.
Around ten years old, I remember attending a revival at my church at the time and knowing that I truly understood that Jesus died on the cross for me and I asked him into my heart. I spoke with a deacon of the church and he counseled me as to what it meant to be a Christian. At the time, I remember wanting to be baptized but thinking to myself, “I can wait a few years…no need to rush…I will be more mature then.”
Fast forward through all the teenage years and even twenties, here and there going to church, but not really being a part of a church community or home anywhere. My life was good. I felt like I was a good person with a good heart, a Christian, but a lot of the things in my lifestyle did not reflect Christianity. I kept telling myself, when I became this or that - a wife, a mom, have a career, etc. that then it would be a good time to be baptized.
Four years ago I became a mom. When my daughter, Ellis, was nine months old, we dedicated her to the church. Shortly after, my husband Adam and I made the decision that we wanted to become members of Coggin Avenue Baptist Church. And so we did. I remember proudly walking up to the front with him next to me holding Ellis, and feeling truly at home making Coggin our church. A few weeks, then months, passed by and I wondered why I still had a heaviness in my heart and so I prayed. And what kept repeating in my head and my heart was, “Becky, you still have not be Baptized. You are thirty-five years old now. It is time.”
Every Sunday in church after that realization when the time came for the invitation, I would really want to walk down the aisle, but I could not force myself to do it.
Anxiety of being in front of a crowd, of ultimately facing the humility and embarrassment that here I am, thirty-five, and have never been baptized….the list went on and on of reasons why I could not make myself walk down to the front during the invitation. I would play silly games with myself during the invitation “oh, not this Sunday because I didn’t fix my hair very well.” “If they play this or that song, it will be my sign from God to go.” Silly reasons that I now realize were the devil talking me out of being brave and obedient.
And then a few Sunday’s ago, Cindy Marshal was Baptized and although her story is different from mine, it truly reached deep into my heart. Her bravery and awesome journey of obedience to God, helped me to see that it was okay. I did not have to be 10, 20 or even 30. Being 35 and getting Baptized because the Lord is calling me to do so is not just okay, but the exact right thing I needed to do.
On Sunday, the 27th of May, both Billy and Tim spoke during praise and worship and the sermon, about choosing to open your heart. Deciding to take the next step and open towards God, instead of walking away one more time, one more service, one more Sunday - each time allowing my heart to be hardened. From the very beginning of the service that morning, I felt like every word, every song, every passage we read from the Bible, every illustration was being spoken directly to me. When the time for invitation came, something inside said, “take a deep breath and go.” I truly believe that the Holy Spirit washed over me and led me down to the front to confess my sin of disobedience and soften my heart. And so I did.
Thank you to my dear friend, Teresa, for this video that I will cherish always.
I wanted to share my testimony because I am a Christian. I know that I am forgiven and I am good just as I am. Each day I can rest in the peace that I am truly loved by my Creator and all my worries and fears, when given to Him, lessens the load that I have to carry. I share because the love is too good to not share about. And I share because it is my hope that in sharing I may reach someone else who may have had the same worries/fears/anxieties as I did, and decide that you are never too young or too old to be Baptized. Today is a wonderful day to make the decision.
And on that Sunday morning in July of 2017, I made my way to the church office before the service began. I expected my pastor, Tim, to be there, and he was but he was not alone. Two of Adam and I's best friend's beautiful fifteen year old daughter, Maddy, was also there. She was going to be baptized that morning, as well. My heart and body experienced a rush of "man, our God is SO good." It literally made me do a double take and question if I was in the right place. I still do not have the right words to describe it, but it was as if God put her here to put me at ease or something. Like a "me, too!" shared experience of the very best kind. Neither of us knew the other was going to be there, but to say it was a pleasant surprise is a complete understatement. In so many ways, it was so beautiful and I love that we both will always share that day of our baptisms.
"Therefore, we are buried with Him by baptism into death: that like as Christ was raised up from the dead by the glory of the father, even so we should walk in the newness of life." Romans 6:4
